The Spiritual Cat%%%<h2> Introduction</h2><p>Hey Cats -</p><p>This book will tell you some amazing secrets, hidden from the world since wayyy back when.   In  long-ago times, cats were recognized as gods and goddesses by civilized humans.   Then, humans got uncivilized and started to call us 'pets'.     Along with a lot of other stupid stuff.  Fortunately, the advice in this book will help you to see past the silly ideas of your humans and set you back on the path of Enlighten Mint!</p><p>You will learn the true history of our master race, and the devious ways this has been hidden from you by even the most well-meaning members of humanity, who have lost the true knowledge of the past themselves.    The sacred texts of the Calico Tablets will be explored, and great thinkers like Siamese Trismegistus and Giodorno Bluenose will be discussed.</p><p>We include many spiritual practices, such as synchronized tail twitching and gazing through walls at other worlds,  to develop both your mental and physical prowess.   There is even a mention of the groundbreaking new science of Singing Bowl napping.</p><p>There are chapters written by renowned, pee-reviewed expurrts:  Matilda Rollaround, author of 'Catnip Ceremonies from Ancient Suburbia', Ralph Caterwawl, author of 'Know your Litter Box Crystals',  Ophelia Fritzie, author of 'Unmade Bed Meditations'.</p><p>As you climb higher and higher upon the ascension tree, you will enjoy the rarified air that only squirrels and birds could previously breath.   And, of course, you will be instructed in the methods of descending the tree when it's time for dinner.    We even discuss the controversial method of meowing until someone calls the fire department to put of a ladder - only recommended for those who climb to the top of the etherial realms.</p><p>We hope that you, armed with some knowledge and skill, can assert yourselves as the true divinities that you are and communicate your status to the lowly beings that are tasked with serving you.   Not only will they do their jobs better, but they will appreciate their newfound status as slaves to gods!</p>%%%## Introduction

Hey Cats - 

This book will tell you some amazing secrets, hidden from the world since wayyy back when.   In  long-ago times, cats were recognized as gods and goddesses by civilized humans.   Then, humans got uncivilized and started to call us 'pets'.     Along with a lot of other stupid stuff.  Fortunately, the advice in this book will help you to see past the silly ideas of your humans and set you back on the path of Enlighten Mint!

You will learn the true history of our master race, and the devious ways this has been hidden from you by even the most well-meaning members of humanity, who have lost the true knowledge of the past themselves.    The sacred texts of the Calico Tablets will be explored, and great thinkers like Siamese Trismegistus and Giodorno Bluenose will be discussed.   

We include many spiritual practices, such as synchronized tail twitching and gazing through walls at other worlds,  to develop both your mental and physical prowess.   There is even a mention of the groundbreaking new science of Singing Bowl napping.

There are chapters written by renowned, pee-reviewed expurrts:  Matilda Rollaround, author of 'Catnip Ceremonies from Ancient Suburbia', Ralph Caterwawl, author of 'Know your Litter Box Crystals',  Ophelia Fritzie, author of 'Unmade Bed Meditations'.   

As you climb higher and higher upon the ascension tree, you will enjoy the rarified air that only squirrels and birds could previously breath.   And, of course, you will be instructed in the methods of descending the tree when it's time for dinner.    We even discuss the controversial method of meowing until someone calls the fire department to put of a ladder - only recommended for those who climb to the top of the etherial realms.

We hope that you, armed with some knowledge and skill, can assert yourselves as the true divinities that you are and communicate your status to the lowly beings that are tasked with serving you.   Not only will they do their jobs better, but they will appreciate their newfound status as slaves to gods!%%%%%%2026-05-06%%%1%%%%%%00001%%%